Marriage Advice

This is a picture of my parents, when my Dad was still with us. He's in Heaven now and my Mom is about to celebrate her 80th birthday. My parents were married for 62 years.

Today, marriages just aren't making it.  Why is that?  I personally believe that one of the best reasons is that people are not really "in love" when they get married. They're "in lust".  Marriage, no matter how you look at it, is hard, once the honeymoon wears off.  Then add to that: children, monthly bills, maybe loss of a job, illness, all the stresses that come with two people living together for a number of years. Most couples today just don't have what it takes to 'stick it out'.  

Why do we hear so many people say that they "just don't love" their mate anymore?  Or that they "fell out of love" with their spouse.  I believe that love is a conscious decision that one makes, not something that they 'fall into' or 'fall out of''.  Many couples today just don't take the time to even see if they are compatible before they 'fall into' bed with each other.  "Love" is a commitment and a sacrifice; wanting someone else's good above your own.  It's unselfish; totally.

My parents loved each other unselfishly; each sacrificing the things they loved for the other and for their children.  You all know what I'm talking about;  giving up "my time" and "my friends" because I'd rather be with you and do what you want to do.  Wanting that other person's happiness more than their own. Raising a family and then sacrificing the things "you" want, in order to give them to your children.

Sacrifice.  There is so little of that today.  Instead we hear men and women saying they 'just want out'.  Why is that?  A majority of the time it's because they've allowed someone (maybe at the office or over the Internet) to get a little "in-road" into their affections and interests.  They made room for that other person in their life, maybe during a moment of boredom in their marriage. Let me tell you, long-term marriages are subject to a little familiarity and boredom from time to time.  Let's face it, there are times in all of our marriages that we "just don't feel it" anymore.  

When you truly love your mate, as Christ loves us, you move ahead and keep going and pray and ask God to restore that love and affection.  We "take it and don't insist on our own way or our own rights".  That's what love is. (Of course, I'm not speaking of a physically abusive situation.)

A dead person has no "rights".  Read Romans Chapter 6.

I thank God for my parents and the love they demonstrated for all six of their children.  Did they ever quarrel or disagree?  Of course they did! Did they stay together through it all?  Yes, they did.  And I thank God for that commitment that was shown to each of us.

There is nothing that is hurting our nation more than the break-up of our homes and families.  There is nothing that hurts our children more than to see their home broken up; to have to divide their time and affection between two parents.  In order to justify their actions, parents deceive themselves into thinking that they can 'make it up' to their kids by giving them more "things". More things is not what they want!  More time with a Mother and  Father that love them UNSELFISHLY is what they want and need.  To have their home whole and secure again, is what they need.  To see two parents living out what it means to really love and sacrifice and put someone else's good above their own, is what they need and want.  Putting 'their' welfare above their own wants and desires. Another deception that parents use to justify their actions for breaking up their home is that  "the kids will be better off when we aren't fighting anymore".  There would BE no fighting if Mom and Dad would set aside their own pride and get on their knees and ask God to help them and to save their marriage. 

I know there are no pat answers for every situation and that there really are some good reasons for divorce today; but the majority of those that divorce are doing it for the wrong reasons and sacrificing their children on the altar of their own self-centered desires. It's time to take a good look at where our nation is going and ask if it's worth it.

Here is a good link to some really good advice on marriage:

 http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8114_fear.html

And here is an excellent link to some really good helps for the home:

 http://www.awana.org

May God save our nation and our homes!

Wading through the murky waters of seeking an Agent

I never knew it could be so hard to actually get a book published!!

The other day, I finally broke down and went to the bookstore and bought three books that were recommended to me:  "Writer's and Illustrator's Guide to Children's Book Publishers and Agents" by Ellen R. Shapiro and "How to Write a Children's Book and Get It Published" by Barbara Seuling and "The Complete Idiot's Guide to Writing Children's Books".  (I should qualify there!) I have my work cut out for me! 

I think I am going to set the actual writing aside for a bit now and just try to get through most of these books.  I've completed two of the "Petie" books now; one is on the website and has actually sold 4 or 5 copies so far!  I'm excited about that!  The other one is in the finishing stages and about to be uploaded, but I'm trying to decide if I want to do that or wait until I find an Agent first.  Then I have a third book that I wrote many years ago and my Mother helped collaborate on the art work; that one has to be typed into the software and uploaded also.  Until then though, I need to get through these books I've purchased, make submissions of query letters to Agents and see what happens.  Making all of the submissions and keeping track of them is the hard part!  Writing is the fun part!

The exciting news for this week though is that I should have my first hard-back book in my hands by this Friday! I'll be so excited to actually hold something I've written, in book form, in my hands!  We're supposed to be leaving for Mississippi on Friday so I'm hoping that the Fed Ex guy comes early before we have to leave so I can take it with me!

We're going to have a busy month the rest of this month now. Next weekend is our own conference that we administer and then the end of the month we'll be traveling to Illinois to see my Mom. She is going to be 80 years old on September 28th!  I'll say more about that later.  When we return from Illinois, we are taking a break and going to Florida for a few days to just relax.  THAT I'm really looking forward to as it will give me some time to just READ and get through these books I've purchased.

More on this adventure later!  I hope all of you have a wonderful week and weekend!

(The picture of the sunflower at the top of this post was taken by my Sister Dawn! 

It's growing in her back yard and is twice as tall as she is!!)

My Book is Selling!

 

Can you say "Excited"??  I'm so excited that I have had a book sell already and I just put my book on the website a  couple days ago!  I'm submitting it to other publishers now and am praying that it will be picked up by the best one!  I have  ideas for several more episodes in the life of our little "Petie".  Getting all of the artwork done though is very time-consuming and I'd really like to have a better artist do the illustrations. I'll see about that when I hear from a publisher.

In the meantime, I'm working on the formatting for the 2nd book and have scanned the illustrations into my computer for uploading. Today I made my first formal submission to a publisher! wow!

I'm running short on time today for getting my allergy shots and then going to my Grandson's birthday party!

I'll keep you posted on the latest on little "Petie"!

New Book!

What have I been up to lately besides painting portraits?

Well....... I have started writing children's books! I have just uploaded my first children's book for sale! I'm working on the second one now and it should be finished soon. I'm so excited! I've always wanted to write and finally just dug in and did it!

You can preview my new book here:

http://www.blurb.com/user/LindaH1248?profile_preview=true

I hope you'll look at it and buy it for your children or grandchildren. There aren't many books on the market for children today that teach obedience, character and manners. This is my aim in writing these books.

Who knows? I may decide I like writing so much I'll even venture out into adult fiction!